Giiiiiiirl, car troubles & men’s vehicular arrogance has me contemplating just doing the oil changes myself from now on. That horrible grinding noise in our car? Not the alternator… funny story how cars like to have oil in them. So peculiar.

I slashed soy sauce (one friggin drop) on my wife 15 years ago. I am still reminded of it. Oh the misery us husbands must suffer.

Isn’t there a local chapter of P.E.T.H. [People for the Ethical Treatment of Husbands] anywhere in Costa Rica? Your repeated cruel and cynical abuse of HIM re. his unfortunate predicament in the grease-pit should be reported to them immediately, and he deserves a public apology online just as quickly!

Consider this notice of my boycott of your site; I refuse to read it again … until your next posting!

Thanks again for the grins.

Please let us apply logic to this situation. Your humor is marvelous, as usual, and “clank, clank,” or “grinnnnnd, pop, snort, and phuuuitf,” ARE far more manly than “weeeeeeee” or the higher-pitched “eeeeeeeee,” but doesn’t “your husband,” (yes, I know his name well, but I agree when gigging, third person references are better. Or at least it helps the giggor feel less guilty about abuse of the giggee.) know that the “weeeeeeee” sound is made “all the way home?” Does that not mean that you will get to one’s goal of getting back home? On the other hand you two are hardly two of five pigs, and indeed not even two of two pigs. If we took the five pigs and their actions as that elusive thing called, “TRUTH,” then we would have to assume that one of you (them) “went to market.” And that one of you (them) “stayed home.” Either different actions of the aforementioned pigs, or new pigs introduced to us would, in turn, result in one (or a third one) having “roast beef,” and the other new pig on the scene (or the second of our original two pigs [try to follow me here]) “would have none.” Which, given the evil of “bad” cholesterol might not be the rather sad situation implied. What if, while the arteries of the roast beef-eating pig were in the process of SLAMMING shut, (which is curious to even be concerned about, since pigs are a roundish wad of congealed, harmful cholesterol on four feet), the pig who had the “none” of roast beef was enjoying a delicious setting of healthy, luscious, juicy, run-down-your-chin, and – who gives a darn anyway because it’s sooooo darn good – tropical fruit. It’s obvious that the original “none” referred to only “roast beef.” It implies, but does not mean as is commonly thought, that this pig, by having no roast beef was suffering in any way. Fallacious logic: “Tom has red hair. Some people with red hair have hot tempers. Therefore, Tom has a hot temper.” But it seems that it is the last little pig that is the true object of this discussion to begin with. Thus, the pig was not only headed home, but it is implied by “ALL (my emphasis) the way home.” shows that he or she reached there. Otherwise, how would the speaker have any idea (other than a illogical assumption) that the aforementioned pig ever reached home? Maybe he or she had a tryst along the way and was interrupted from weeeeeeeeing all the way home. (There may have been some “weeeeeeeeing” involved, but not from traveling home. Or perhaps he or she stopped off for a quick drink with the girls from the office, or he dropped by Duffy’s Tavern for a quick one with his buddies from their fantasy (dare I say it?) pigskin teams. (Yes, I dared.) There could have been a thousand and one reasons why he or she did not make it all the way home still yelling, “weeeeeeee,” but the fact is that the speaker said, “all.” not “almost” nails home
the fact that it was the sound made all the way to that most wonderful destination, “home.” Therefore, by the simply stated and easily followed, short and pure reasoning, it is proved that to get safely home, one must cry, “weeeeeeee” all the way. The sticking one’s head out the window to catch the cool breeze in the face and through one’s hair while waving a drooling tongue lapping up tens of thousands of exotic smells, is completely up to the pig…er, person. I thank you.